The powerful grace of voluntary suffering is integral to the essence of Christ-mas joy. From the moment that Mary first heard the angel’s greeting, she knew that she would be facing serious pain (with joy). Pregnancy at this moment in her life would not only be scandalous but even life-threatening, due to the penalty for a condition which would be seen as an indication that she had been unfaithful to her betrothed husband, Joseph. Yet Mary humbly, willingly, even gratefully (that is, gracefully) accepted this lifelong path of suffering.

Her situation was quite unique, because the Child she was graced to carry had chosen this path of suffering, from the foundation of the world. Jesus chose to clothe Himself in tender flesh and blood (even the tenuous condition of a microscopic conceptus), so that He could sacrifice Himself to favor Mary (and all others who would so humbly accept Him) with grace. He chose this path of suffering not through a morbid desire to maximize His personal pain, but “for the joy set before Him,” for the eternal benefit of His offspring like Mary.

Yet in many ways Mary’s situation was not unique. As we have ministered to pregnant women who have been considering abortion over our decades of ministry, God has graced many of them with the willingness to bear the suffering of an embarrassing (even scandalous) situation — for the joy set before them. Every one of the difficulties which led them to the doors of the abortion chamber continued to exist after they made the choice to repent, yet the decision to persevere through that suffering leads again and again to an effervescent joy (as we have seen repeatedly).

A sullen woman suddenly becomes ecstatic when she purposes to suffer through her pregnancy, through God’s grace. Her attempt to short-circuit her suffering through abortion could have led instead to an unthinkable path of lifelong self-torture, but her determination to persevere through suffering leads to a lifelong path of joy.

How can that be? Repentance transforms the purposeless suffering of abortion (which cuts short the purpose of her pregnancy) into the purposeful suffering for which every mother’s heart yearns. Yet even those who continue on the path to abortion can experience purposeful suffering: if they repent, God promises to work it all together for good (even though the tragic loss of her child was not good).

In modern churches, we may rarely hear the King James version of Matthew 19:14, but Jesus’ command to “suffer little children, and forbid them not” carries key significance in this context. The essence of the Old English meaning of “suffer” is to “carry or bear” — as in “to bear children.” From the moment that sin entered the world, bearing children has always involved suffering (with eons of mothers testifying to the joy facilitated through that suffering). The rich meaning of the old word “suffer” even embodies the painful joy a birth mother willingly experiences when she surrenders her child to an adoptive mother.

Considering the permeating effect of child aversion within our culture and congregations today, perhaps it would be appropriate for pastors to consider re-issuing the challenge to “suffer the children, and forbid them not,” even the when that child is a microscopic conceptus.

Pro-life ministry itself is often a life of willful suffering, a cross we willingly bear. When we open our hearts to care deeply for vulnerable mothers and children, we do so knowing that more often than not, our hearts will be broken. Without God’s grace, a hardened, calloused heart would be inevitable for all of us. How can we continue to care, knowing how much it will hurt?

Even within the faithful of our movement, all too often we see hearts become hardened toward the mothers, focusing primarily on the suffering of their innocent children. Other hearts become hardened toward the children, focusing on the suffering of the mothers. But our suffering Savior calls us again and again to let Him transform our hearts of stone into hearts of flesh, for both mother and child (and everyone else).

The essential meaning of “Christ-mas” is that we are sent (Latin mittere) to share in the suffering of Christ, who suffered for us so that He can suffer through us. May you experience the fullness of His joy as you offer yourself as a living sacrifice to Jesus, this Christmas and throughout the coming year.

“For it has been granted to you that for the sake of Christ you should not only believe in Him but also suffer for His sake.”

(Philippians 1:29)